Self-Control? Never Heard of Her

Sep 12

I didn’t plan to inhale the entire bag of peach rings in one sitting. But somehow, here we are. No shame, no regrets.

The kids were in full meltdown mode, the dog was losing his mind, and I was just trying to make it to bedtime without barricading myself in the laundry room.

Enter: 365 Sour Peach Rings from Whole Foods.

At $3.49 a bag, these little orange halos of sugar promise to be the budget-friendly sidekick I never knew I needed.

Because, let's be honest, Whole Foods has a reputation. Sometimes I walk in there and feel like I need a second mortgage to buy almond butter.

But the 365 Everyday Value brand is Whole Foods' way of saying, "We know you're broke but still want to snack like you practice yoga at sunrise."

And honestly? I appreciate that.

The Ingredients (aka the part that makes me feel like less of a bad mom)

Here's what's inside: cane sugar, tapioca syrup, citric acid, palm oil, turmeric for color (because Whole Foods loves sneaking vegetables into candy), red cabbage juice concentrate (who knew cabbage was the life of the party?), and then… dextrose.

Dextrose. My nemesis.

It's basically sugar's less-fun twin who shows up to the playdate uninvited. I get it—it's cheap, it bulks up candy, and food scientists love it. But couldn't we throw in something friendlier?

Coconut sugar, honey crystals, maybe even monk fruit? I'm not saying I expect peach rings to be a health food. However, suppose Whole Foods plans to sell them under their "365" brand, which is intended to convey a better-for-you vibe. In that case, I'd like my indulgence without feeling like I just licked a chemistry set.

The Taste Test

That said, I can't lie. These rings taste good. The sour hits first— more like your toddler's side-eye when you cut their sandwich wrong. At least it wasn't a complete tantrum. Followed by a wave of peachy sweetness that almost makes you forget you haven't had a hot meal in three days. They're chewy, tangy, and dangerously addictive.

My husband and I tried them together, and they tasted, plain and simple, like "clean" candy, which left us feeling absolutely no shame when the entire bag was gone.

Why 365?

The 365 brand has been around since 1997, built on the idea of affordable, natural products you can actually trust.

Whole Foods bans hundreds of sketchy ingredients from their shelves, which means even when I cave to candy cravings, I don't feel like I'm handing my kids a neon chemical experiment. Add in the fact that I can have Amazon Prime these peach rings delivered straight to my porch without changing out of my pajama pants? Sold.

Final Verdict

Do these peach rings count as fruit? No. Do they spark joy amidst a chaotic mom life? Absolutely. For $3.49, you're getting a bag of candy that feels slightly bougie without the bougie price tag.

In my brutally honest opinion, the dextrose makes me roll my eyes, but the sour-sweet payoff keeps me coming back. These peach rings slap harder than my Wi-Fi cutting out during a work call. Sweet, sour, affordable, and maybe a better coping mechanism than hiding in the pantry. 9/10—Whole Foods, ditch the dextrose and we'll talk perfection.