Size Matters (and Yumster Yo! Bars Missed the Memo)

Sep 19

Okay, so let's talk about these little snack bars that landed in my kitchen: the Yumster Yo! Bar Cookie Dough Swing.

First impressions? They've got every trendy label slapped on the box like a Whole Foods starter pack: USDA Organic, Non-GMO, Gluten Free, Vegan Certified, Peanut Free, and Plant-Based.

Basically, they're screaming, "Look at me! I'm a clean snack! Put me in your kid's lunchbox and feel superior at pickup time."

And I was already laughing when I saw the box literally say: "… don't feel bad if you happen to eat the whole box in one sitting." Oh, thank God. Because if they're good, there is zero chance I'm stopping at one.

Here's the kicker: these bars only have three ingredients—dates, almond butter, and unsweetened dark chocolate. That's it. No mystery powders. No twelve-syllable preservatives. Just three things that sound like they could have come straight from a Pinterest mom's pantry.

But here's my personal problem: I. Hate. Dates. Like, passionately. They've ruined more "healthy" recipes for me than I care to admit. So I went into this review fully prepared to spit one out dramatically into a napkin.

But oh my god. I'm obsessed. These bars taste mostly like chocolate—bless. If these bars had been mostly dates, you'd be reading a very different blog post right now. But instead, I actually wanted another one… and then another. They're soft, chewy, and surprisingly rich for such a tiny little thing.

And my husband? He's hooked. This man will eat anything labeled as organic if I tell him it is. "Babe, they're all organic." Done deal. He's in love.

We definitely ate the whole box of five in one sitting…

The texture is super soft, so even little kids could eat them without choking. But here's the mom gripe: they're so small. Like, offensively small. I'm talking about a four-inch bar that barely counts as a bite if you've had a stressful day.

If Yumster already knows people are going to plow through a whole box, why not just… make the bars bigger? Revolutionary idea, I know.

For context, I bought my box of five bars on Thrive Market for $5.29. Not terrible for organic and vegan, but when you realize the bars are basically the size of a kindergartener's crayon, you start to feel a little salty about it.

One bar feels less like a snack and more like an edible suggestion. Which is fine if you're a toddler, but if you're me—running on caffeine and chaos—it's borderline insulting.

Look, Yumster nailed the flavor. They tricked me—a date hater—into loving a date-based bar. That's a culinary miracle. But the size? Total letdown. It's like finding a great show on Netflix and realizing it only has one season.